I just forced myself to watch all 10 minutes and 9 seconds of this video.
It was truly one of the most gut-wrenching experiences I have ever had. My stomach started churning 10 seconds into the video.
I want to share my first and raw thoughts from the video and I would love to hear your reaction…
1. Bullying Should Not Be Ignored
The issue of Bullying is so complex. When I think through, “How can I stop bullying?” It feels like someone just asked me to fit all the water from Niagra Falls in a milk jug. It feels impossible. But if you are tempted to think that the emphasis on Bullying is too much, just watch this video. It has captivated the country because this emotional abuse is happening every day to kids. We can’t stop educating and bringing attention to this subject no matter how overwhelming it might seem to find the solution.
2. Educate Your Teenager
Because you love and believe in your teenager, I am sure you think they would never participate in this kind of Bullying. I am not at all disputing that. I do, however, believe that our love for our kids allows us to underestimate the human capacity for evil and the power of the mob mentality like the example in this video.
When I wrote on the “Facebook Parenting: For the Troubled Teen” video (include link-http://www.parentzilla.com/facebook-parenting-for-the-troubled-teen/) many of you wanted to argue with me about who was at blame. I will say now what I said then, everyone in this situation shares the blame (except of course, the victim). I am not at all saying what happened on that bus was normal, but I am saying that humans have the capacity for that kind of evil. Unfortunately, all of us are human.
Therefore, this should serve as a reminder to educate your teenager against the evil of Bullying.
Some of you might disagree with me, but if this video is anything it is a very raw education tool.
You might think the language and content is too intense, and I will respect that. But I also believe if your teenager is mature enough to handle it, this video is one of the best discussion starters on bullying that you are going to find. You could watch it together as the doorway to a conversation that could make the difference between your teenager becoming the Bully or the one who stands up against the Bully.
Another great resource to watch with your teenager to get them talking about this subject is the documentary “Bully”. You can learn more at www.bullyproject.com
…I have to admit, I knew this video was out there (how could I not) but I didn’t want to see it. I didn’t watch it when it hit the news, I just wanted it to go away. Not that I didn’t feel sorry for that poor woman but I didn’t want to believe that it actually happened…and it scared me because my son is that age and I don’t know how I would have reacted if he had been involved with something so horrible.
I finally decided to watch it here on Parentzilla and needed to comment, what human being wouldn’t have something to say. I couldn’t finish the video…the first 8 minutes was enough.
My husband and I have had a number of conversations about bullying fom our own personal experiences to the level of bullying seen today. Like Parentzilla said…tackling this issue is like trying to ‘fit the water from Niagara Falls into a milk jug’.
But one thing I do feel is that like a lot of things….bad behavior breeds bad behavior. I think we really need to look at the role models in today’s society…Reality TV shows like Jersey Shore and Real Housewives teach us how to treat people like s**t. I use that term because other words aren’t strong enough. Even a seamingly ‘good’ show about kids learning to dance on Lifetime’s Dance Moms is an embarrassment to decency and respect. And what’s the most troubling and disturbing is that these women are TEACHING these young girls how to be spoiled, conniving, cruel and manipulative. And for what?, their five minutes of fame?
Look at our political leaders right now as they campaign for the upcoming election. Their ads on TV are demeaning and a wonderful example of Bullying. They even have names for these ads! Just Google Negative Political Ads and you’ll see.
Don’t we see it yet? How can we ask our kids to behave decently and with goodness and kindness towards our fellow man if we don’t lead by example. It seems to me that in today’s world we are hell bent on destroying each other with painful words and actions. We don’t have to worry about whether or not we will survive in the world because of climate change, global warming or a nuclear bomb…we are doing a fabulous job of destroying ourselves.
well said, jules. i can relate so much to the emotion you felt.
My initial reaction was one of horror because I immediately thought of my grandchildren who have access to facebook and would listen to all the filthy language in this video. But then I realized this is probably mild compared to some of the language they hear at school and from their friends. Having retired from public education as a teacher and administrator, I am very much aware of the things that go on that parents never know. It would take days to relate some of the things I’ve seen and heard from students–from observation of physical contact between students in hidden places (or so they thought) to viewing videos from school buses, to listening to conversations in hallways and classrooms when students thought nobody was listening or paying attention, to handwritten filthy notes accidentally left in classrooms and on and on and on. Parents may never be informed of the situations because the parents will generally side with the students instead of heeding the warnings of the teacher and/or administrator. The point I am trying to make is that one of the greatest mistakes “good” parents make is that we assume our children would never participate in such activities because of all the hard work we have expended to teach them proper behavior. But you are so right about the “mob mentality” and how it affects students because they want to fit in, be part of the crowd, and totally ignore at the moment the things they know to be right. The standards in our society have been so eroded by constant exposure to filth that there is no respect for self or for others. Don’t dismiss the things I’ve said because children may be in private instead of public schools. I have a niece who graduated from a very upscale, high academic private school in another state who was bullied through most of high school by other students who were the sons and daughters of prominent professionals in the community. The administrators did nothing about the situation because private schools often depend on those professionals for most of their support and refuse to “rock the boat”; so students who are bullied will endure the torment to get the quality of education they desire and be able to get into the higher academic universities and receive scholarships to do so. Wake up parents!
thanks sylvia,
it’s great to get the opinion of someone who has been on both sides as a parent and a school official.